Normal is Perception, Evil is Irrefutable
by Claire Pliskin
Summary: A series of short facets based on my ordeals at the hands of my father. Please do not judge me, for at the time I was merely a girl, but I feel the time is right to share my ordeals with any who will listen. In the hopes of preventing this from happening to another, innocent life. Warning - Not for those of a squeamish nature. Contains themes of a dark sexual nature.
1. Dark Descent - Joel

Some people call me a 'good' man. I don't know why. Some people call me a 'kind' man, and I guess that can be true. I've never stolen from anybody, or hurt anybody, or even been unjust towards those who have wronged me... so yeah, I guess you can call me a kind man. But am I a normal man? That, rests solely on what you 'yourself' deem to be 'normal'. Would 'I' consider myself to be a 'normal' man? Again, that is purely your own perception. I consider myself to be normal. But then again, what is normal for 'me' most people would find... well if you're reading this far in I guess you get the jest.

No... I do not consider myself to be a normal man. But I do consider myself a 'good' man, and no matter what you may think of me after reading this, pleases understand that what I do, and what I did, I did with the sole intention of being a good man. Even if being good, was only being good to myself.

My descent into abnormality began with one person, a person who, up until then, had been the most important person in my life. My little daughter... Sarah.

My little baby girl had grown so big, even at 12 years old I wondered what happened to the sweet little cupcake I used to cradle during nap time. No... my baby girl was all grown up, and soon I began to notice that my feelings towards my once innocent little angel began to change.

I'm not quite sure when it happened. Maybe... Maybe it was after Christmas? Or maybe it was after her graduation? All I knew, was that once my little rose began to blossom, I couldn't help but let my eyes a wandering and my thoughts to go a drifting.

It started off small. My 'clumsy' meandering into the bathroom while she was taking a piss. Or my innocent little 'cuddles' when we'd snuggle together on the couch. Sarah had always been 'daddy's girl' and didn't seem to mind when my hand would linger a little 'too long' on her ass. I was daddy after all, and daddy wouldn't hurt his little baby girl.

But things soon started to get out of hand.

I noticed she began wearing those cute little PJ's around the house, even though it was the middle of the afternoon. That soft, baby blue top and those cute little pants. When had her hair become so cute? Did I get her to cut it that way? Her mother had never worn her hair that way, but now that I nocited it, Sarah looked even more adorable when her hair was cut short.

It was getting ridiculous. I began to jerk off. Trying to get the tempting visions of my daughter out of my head, but no matter how hard I tried. I found I couldn't cum without the thought of my Sarah sucking my cock.

What the hell was wrong with me?

I couldn't take this. But neither could I leave my daughter to the mercy of the world. Even if I 'needed' to get some help. No, my Sarah needed me, and after all, I was, in the end, a good man.

But goodness... only takes you so far in life, and on the eve of my daughters thirtheeth birthday, that goodness finally broke.

Sarah came home from Grade school ecstatic and full of life. She had just aced her end of year exam, and soon would be moving on up to 7th grade. What the hell was going on? My little girl was growing up too fast!

I tried to act pleased for her, praising and applauding my baby girl and stating at how 'proud I was' of her. All the while racked by fear that soon my little dove would be free to fly the nest.

We celebrated with pizza, cherry coke and a movie, Sarah getting dressed in those damn PJ's again, before finally falling asleep next to me on the couch. Her head rested so sweetly against my chest, as my fingers softly ran through her soft, golden hair.

I felt my heart begin to pace as she breathed so gently against my pecks. My god... when had she become so beautiful?

"Sarah...? You awake baby girl?"

"Mmm...?" Sarah breathed. God, even asleep the damn girl was inticing. I felt my dick begin to throb as I softly began to grow more daring. My touch began to drift down across her back, lingered gently against her cute little ribs. She was so delicate, a sweet little rose bud. I willed myself not to touch any further, but felt my had drift to the forbidden mound of her tit.

I withdrew my hand at once! Reeling as if It'd been burned.

What the hell was wrong with me? This was my daughter...! My baby girl! My child! I couldn't do this to her. I couldn't...

But... but slowly, my hand came back to rest upon her spine, her back as I softly caressed her gently, soothingly. Hoping to ease myself into a state of relaxed acceptance. Then, I heard her moan with approval beneath my touch.

"Sarah...? You like that?"

"Mhm..." Sarah wriggled in her sleep, her head moving slowly down towards my now aching crotch.

Oh... my god!

Slowly, unable to resist, I worked my cock free of my pants, itself now almost fully erect as I began to slowly jerk off. My hand rested back at the side of her tit once more, only this time I willed myself to go further... Slowly, I placed my hand at the very tip of her unblossomed chest and felt my balls surge with delight.

"Oh, god..." She felt soooo good. I moaned as I felt her nipple ripen against my palm, my fingers drifting gently over the now hardening tip, which drew another sigh of approcal from my sweet, sweet child.

"You like that, baby girl?" I asked, jerking my cock off slowly as it loomed so close to my baby's face.

"Mmm..." Her mouth opened slowly, I could feel it, her breath caressing the tip of my now raging meat. My will was breaking, my heart racing as I tried to get myself off. I couldn't do this... I couldn't keep touching my daughter like this... But as my balls began to tighten and my dick grew harder, I couldn't resist any longer. I knew, being so close to my ultimate climax, that I'd never be able to get off like this.

Slowly, gently, so as not to wake up my sweet little angel, I worked her mouth fully open with the tips of my fingers, before placing the tip of my cock against her waiting lips.

I willed myself not to do this... I knew this was wrong. But the feel of her mouth was too inticing, the touch of her lips too tempting, the feel of her breathe caressing my dick to good to be ignored.

I issued a prayer for God to forgive me, as I slowly placed my hand against the of Sarah's head; and forced my baby to take my throbbing dick.


	2. Dark Descent - Sarah

My life had always been a happy one. Even though my mother had died back when I was six, my Daddy had always been the one to look after me. Always the one to make things right. Always the man I could rely on.

My Daddy was perfect!

At least, that's what I thought up until things started getting 'weird'.

I'm not sure when it happened. Maybe it began before fall? Maybe when I was even younger. My mind is not that great at remembering things like that, especially when to count the fact that I have dyslexia, so remembering silly little things like that doesn't really stick around in my head too often.

But then again, I guess you also tend to block things that scare you, things that hurt you, things tht make you feel frightened from your mind. Even now, as I lie here, writing in my diary, I'm finding it hard to recall everything that happened to me even though Daddy isn't with me any more.

The police say I shouldn't be frightened any more. That Daddy can't hurt me. But… in truth, he never did hurt me. Not in the way some people say he 'should' have. I don't know why, but even now, with him locked away in… I don't want to think about that. I still find myself… missing him.

I'm scared now, scared of what people will say about me. Scared that people will think I'm evil, like Daddy said they would. Why would people think I'm evil? I'm not evil am I? People say Daddy is evil, but what is evil anyway?

I guess things started getting weird after around my twelfth birthday, that's when I can really recall things getting 'weird'. Up until then, Daddy had been fine. He had just been… Daddy. Going to work, making me lunch, even picking me up sometimes from school. We lived in Small Town USA, and so Daddy walking me home from school was never something I 'needed'. After all I was a big girl, and I could look after myself.

But yeah, things had begun to get weird, after my twelfth birthday, I didn't notice things right away, just, little things. How Daddy would wander into the bathroom if I was taking a shower, or when I was on peeing. He'd always apologies, and say he 'didn't know I was in here'. But I was certain I had told him once or twice. But when it started happening to often I began to lock the door.

What was going on with my Daddy?

Sometimes, when I was at school, I'd think about him, and what was going on with him. I remember once, when I was reaching for the cereal box, how Daddy came up behind me and reached up for the cereal box. He was a little to close though, and wouldn't let me move, even though he was shifting against me and reaching for the box. I could swear I felt something digging against my ass, but I didn't worry about it at the time. Daddy was just being helpful, I loved my Daddy. Daddy wouldn't hurt me.

Ignorance can be bliss sometimes, but in matters like this, ignorance can be more a hindrance than a help.

If I had known what Daddy was doing. What he was 'going' to do. Maybe I would have been more careful with how I presented myself. I never thought that me wearing my little PJ's would get me into so much trouble. I only wore them because they were comfortable, nice and airy for the summer time. However Daddy seemed to like them a little 'too much'.

But, as an ignorant little kid, I left those thoughts in the gutter, even though Daddy himself deserved to put his thoughts there instead. But thoughts became intentions, and intentions became acts, on the day I came home from my 6th grade graduation.

I hadn't been as innocent as he expected. With dyslexia I needed a little help from a 'text book' to ace my finals. To try and ace an exam without it would be stupid. But then again, I wanted to make Daddy proud of me, and at first I thought I succeeded.

He seemed to be happy, giving me hugs and kisses, even buying my favorite pizza and soda to celebrate. But something did not seem right with my Daddy. He wasn't as cheery, nor as merry as I thought he would be. Almost like something was bothering him. But I decided to ask him about it after the movie we'd rented was over.

It wasn't a very good movie. I'd always liked animation, but I was growing too old for Disney now. Also, why did all the movies need to be 3D? I liked the old style, the ones I used to watch as a kid. I don't remember much up until what happened, happened. But I guess I had fallen asleep. I've never been much of a deep sleeper, so when I felt Daddy stroking my hair I sighed and snuggled deeper into him.

"Sarah… You awake baby girl?"

Sort off… I wasn't really asleep, but I was… dozing? I could hear the movie still playing in the background, and I didn't want to watch any more. But it felt so nice having Daddy stroke my hair, I just couldn't help but sigh.

"Mmm..." I'm not asleep Daddy, but I don't mind.

I felt Daddy stiffen slightly against my cheek, and frowned at this. Why was Daddy upset? I hadn't done anything, had I? But as if in response to my worries, Daddy began to stroke my back, comforting me, telling me it was okay.

'Thank you Daddy…' I whispered softly in my head and settled back into sleep, my head deeper further into his lap.

I don't know what happened next, all I know is something happened. I was drifting into an easy sleep when I felt something enter my mouth. My eyes opened sheepishly and felt my mouth forced open by something huge. I tried to pull my head back, tried to see what it was that my mouth was stuffed with, by I felt something on the back of my head keeping it there.

What was going on?

Why couldn't I move?

My mouth was full to bursting, and at first I thought about biting whatever it was that was in my mouth. But then I looked down, and saw my Daddy's pants, his hand and his watch. Daddy was here… then… that meant that…

Whatever was in my mouth Daddy had put there, that much I knew for sure, and as I felt my mind wake up I realized that my head was in Daddy's lap, and that Daddy's hand was on the back of my head, and that Daddy's 'thing' was in my mouth.

"Mmm… Mmm..." I tried to make Daddy understand, tapping my hand against his thigh to let him know I was awake. What was going on? Why was Daddy suffocating me?

"Ooh… that's right baby..." I heard Daddy moan as he slowly allowed my head to bob up and down on his 'thing'. "Suck it baby… suck it real good..."

Suck? What did he mean?

I was scared. Worried I had upset Daddy. Worried that he knew I had cheated on my test. Was that why he was doing this? Was that why I couldn't breathe?

Suck…?

I remembered the popsicle I had coming home from school, it was big, and could fit that in my mouth. I used to suck on that.. was that what he meant? But Daddy's thing was even bigger than Mr Sofftie's biggest popsicle, and it was opening my mouth to wide.

I felt tears begin to seep down my cheeks, tears more from fear than from pain, as I slowly felt Daddy draw my head back and began to suck on the tip of this 'thing'.

"Ooooh…! God...!" Daddy moaned and I sobbed as Daddy forced his thing back and forth into my mouth. I sucked as best I could, hard and soft, using my tongue when and where I could to try and lick him clean. His hand was now hard on the back of my head pushing his 'thing' deeper and deeper into my mouth. Daddy stop I'm going to die!

"Oooh yeah… that's it baby girl..."

Daddy please… stop it.

I was sucking hard now, trying to force Daddy to let me go. I heard him moan even deeper when I did this, and I was frightened I was hurting him. But I was scared Daddy was going to hurt 'me' and I needed him to let me go.

My head bobbed up and down his thing, tears now staining my cheeks as he began to thrust his hips up to meet my face.

Daddy… what's going on? Why are you doing this?

I choked.

Daddy thrusting too hard into my mouth as I tried to pull my head back.

Daddy please, stop, I can't take any more.

Daddy forced by head, my mouth further onto his 'thing' his other hand frantically rubbing the rest of it, the rest I couldn't get into my mouth, as he finally let out a long scream of pain.

I felt something salty, something thick gush into my mouth as Daddy forced all of his thing into my mouth. My body writhed in fear as I felt his 'thing' choke off from any chance I had of breathing. I had no choice. I began to swallow the thick, gooey stuff. It tasted heavy, like salty butter, but there was so much of it I couldn't swallow it all. I felt some run out my mouth and along his 'thing' and it seemed like there was no end to how much this stuff gushed in my mouth.

Finally, Daddy's hips finally stopped flexing and the gooey stuff finally began to relent. Daddy allowed my head to come off his 'thing' and I breathed a desperate sigh of relief. I struggled to understand what had just happened as some of the salty butter ran down down my chin. Daddy put his thing back into his pants I felt him rest my head against his lap and happily pat me on the head. Like he did whenever I was a 'good girl'.

Had I been a good girl? I hoped that I had been; and that Daddy wasn't upset with me any more. I lay there, my head resting against his still throbbing 'thing' itself now hidden beneath his pants, hoping that whatever had happened was over.

Little did I know that Daddy would find more reasons to be _upset_ with me, and how I could be a _good girl_ in the future.


	3. Distortion - Joel

Distortion - Joel

'Oh God! What have I done?!' the question came roiling through me quacking through my ass hole long after my daughter had sucked the very life out of my... 'Oh shit... Oh fuck. ..'

What was I going to do? A million and one thoughts went crashing through my head, all of them ending with me locked up in some 8X10 jail cell with Butch McDick stuffed so far up my ass I could pass for a RuPaul contestant.

'Shit...' I couldn't go to jail... What about Sarah? Who would look after her? That's rich coming from me anyway after force feeding her blue balls and chorizo.

'For fuck sake calm down...' I needed to think. Needed to some how fix this utterly fucked up situation. Well there is your gun in the dresser draw... You could just blow your brains out and be done with it. People like you deserve worse than that anyway.

'Ooh... God...' guilt tore through my soul like a Romero zombie, rolling onto my front I roared out my frustration into the pillows. I couldn't do it.

You can't... Or you don't want to? The taste of cotton assaulted my taste buds as I tried to think about anything other than the feeling of having my sweet little girls mouth wrapped around my stiff hard cock.

Have you ever tried so hard 'not' to think about something that in the end its all your mind can think off. How messed up is that?

It had felt good though... Warm... Moist... The noise she made when trying to take everything. That soft, sweet gargling when her tongue had pushed to far into the back of her throat.

Jesus christ man what is wrong with you! But the seeds were already sown and like a fungus designed to infect the brain, I could feel my thoughts dissolving into a malaise of pleasure, pain and most harrowing of all... Justification.

It wasn't really that bad was it... I mean... I didn't hurt her... Well not in a physical sense. Maybe I had frightened her a little bit. But a little explanation would soon clear that up... After all, Sarah's nearly a teenager. Hell, girls even younger than her are getting knocked up all over the place. A blowjob wasn't 'that' bad was it. I mean... I... I hadn't gotten laid regularly ever since Jane died. I mean... Does paying for it really even count as getting laid? After all... I don't really want another woman in my life.

Looking over to the bedside table the gloom made seeing the family portrate almost impossible, but I had stared at that picture so often I could see it perfectly. Sarah had bearly gotten out of kindergarten when that picture had been taken. Me, Jane and our baby girl on vacation out in the Oragon woodlands.

Jane had cut her hair into that adorable pixycut... The same on I had been having Sarah's cutting into ever since she was six. She looked so much like her mommy now. From the small frame, to her cute little cheeks, to the way she wore her hair, even down to the way she walked, with that sexy sway of her tight little toosh.

Oh My god... Are we actually doing this? I tried to talk myself out of where my head was going. But the aching pain in my balls hurt so badly, thinking about my wife, thinking about my daughter. My hand reached into the waistband of my pj's and I wrapped my hand around my already rock hard dick. The pleasure tightened like a knot behind my pelvis, the need for relief making my almost nauseous as I slowly began to stroke myself off.

'I miss you so much honey...' I pleaded to the picture of my wife. Hoping, praying, wishing that she understood. 'I don't want anyone else... Just you.'

Faster and faster my hand began to pump. Hard, the dry friction of my hand feeling to tight that it almost burned around my dick. God... So tight... I remembered her warm mouth sucking hard and deep against my shaft, her tongue swirling fast around the tip as I tried to work the feeling with the palm of my hand.

'Oh shit baby... Like that.' she had been so good. Her throat so tight, I clamped my hand tighter round my dick hand, her head bobbing so desperately on my head. Using two hands I tried to remember. The feeling so good, the sensation no where near as sweet. But as I worked myself up into a frenzy I blew my load straight down the throat of the memory of.

"Saaarahhh...!"

That one orgasm left my in such a messy that my brain felt like it had just been beaten by a blender... My spine was quailing, quaking practically quavering with bliss as my load plastered over my belly like a hot mess. I was a fucking mess. I was messed up. I was sick. I was twisted.

But I knew right there and then... That I could never look my daughter the same way again. I had destroyed the trust my wife had placed in me after she'd died. I had raped the memory of my wife as deep as I had raped our sweet, baby girls tight little throat.

And I wanted to do it again.


	4. Distortion - Sarah

Distortion - Sarah

The thick taste of whatever daddy's 'thing' had spewed into my mouth still coated my tongue like a film of salty oil.

I lay, curled up in a ball on top of my Pingu bedsheets, one arm wrapped around my quivering legs the other clamped tight around my duvet holding it like I use to hold my mommy's old comforter. I had been only six when mommy had died and even now I sometimes think 'If I had only told the truth. If I hadn' t been pretending to be sick so that the other kids wouldn't tease me because of my dislexia. Only wanted to avoid book day... Why did she have to go to the store to buy me those drugs? I didn't even need them anyway! Why couldn't she just stay home and watch TV with me? Why did that idiot guy not watch where the fuck he was going? Why did that bastard have to drive his car into my mom?!'

I remember daddy telling me about it... How it happened. Though the memories for me are still a blur. Something about the guy trying to get to the hospital. Some stupid shit about his son, construction sites and electricity. Some god knows what nonsense about an accident and that he didn't mean to be driving so recklessly.

But that didn't matter to me. The fucking bastard had hit my mom. Why couldn't the idiot have hit someone else's mom?! Why did it have to be mine?! Why did I have to lie? Why couldn't I just be normal and have just gone to book day?! Then my mom would still be alive. Then daddy would be happy. Then... Then maybe he wouldn't have scared me like he did tonight.

I tried hard not to remember. But for some crazy reason when you try not to think about something it keeps playing over in your mind even more.

Had I done something wrong?  
Was it because I had cheated on my test why daddy had tried to choke me?  
No... Daddy wouldn't do that. My daddy would never hurt me over something like that.  
My daddy never hurt me at all.

So then... Why was I so scared now?

I couldn't think straight.  
My throat still ached a little bit from how his thing had pushed into it.  
But what worried me even more so was my legs.  
They kept quivering every time I thought of it and I remembered how I felt when he had first started bobbing my head up and down when I had first started to suck his 'thing'.

I felt like I was going to pee.  
My remembered how my 'special place' had gotten really ichy. Like how it did after I had finished going to the bathroom.  
But... I hadn't needed to pee when he finished. Even after he had let me stand up.  
After I had staggered over to the bathroom and tried to wash the taste out of my mouth.

My special place will still ichy and now... I could feel it getting warmer as I thought about what had happened on the couch again. My special place feeling warm, achy, like a tight knot had bunched up right below my gut. My skin prickled as I tried to ignore the feeling and I groaned with pain into my pillow as I tried not to touch the burning poola between my legs.

"Daddy please... Stop..." I cried as I ground my groin into the bed. Tears washed down my face as I balled my bedsheets into my fists and prayed to god to make this stop.

The ache burn between my legs called to me, almost pleaded with me to sooth the welling need that soaked through my pajama pants.

"Nooo... I can't..." I bit down hard into my pillow. Trying harder to ground my groin into the sheets. Little sparkles burst from my chest and was sent dancing across my skin as I rubbed my little tits against the bed.

"Nooo... Mommy said nooo!" I pleaded to the sopping heat between my thighs. Trying to make the aching go away. Mommy had told me when I was six no one was allowed to touch me there. No one. Not my teacher. Not my friends. Not me. No one. Not even daddy was allowed to touch my special place. So why wouldn't it stop begging me too?!

"Please... Go away..."

I couldnt bare it any more.  
I could feel myself breathing hard. I knew I needed to stop this.  
But I wasn't allowed to touch my special place. I had promised mommy I wouldn't.  
But... Daddy's room was just down the hall.

I couldn't handle the pain anymore.  
It was growing to hot.  
To tempting.  
To nice...

Would I be safe walking past daddy's room?  
Even just to have a shower?


End file.
